God's Love

Yesterday my step-mom, which I do hate calling her that, Valinda, called me to share her observations of our new family and God's love. I have had this thought many times during the adoption process as well. It was great for her to share with me though.
Today as one of my daycare boys came in the house, Steeven got so excited, even giddy. Abby made the best comment ever, "Steeven is a bundle of joy!" She really said that, what a great kid. God has really blessed me in that area. All four of them are truely wonderful. Of course they all have their moments, just like the rest of us, but really they are great kids. To see how they have taken Steeven and loved him like he has always been here is remarkable. This is not lost on me. It comes to mind daily and my thoughts go to God, who has prearranged all of this.
What must he think as he looks down and sees his plan in motion? When I think of something and follow through with it and it goes well I am pretty pleased with myself, you know. I wonder if he feels that way? Well he is God so he doesn't have the problem with selfish pride. He is probably proud of his creation, being us, and I can feel him smiling at me. Like when one of my kids does something great and I think, wow he/she is really something.
Back to God's love. It really is hard to comprehend how much God loves us and why he even does. We are broken and messed up and aren't even his blood relative yet he has offered us an equal place in his family and his unconditional love. Adoption is the closest earthly comparison for me. Going through the paper process was one thing, but actually having Steevie here is another. It gives me an even greater understanding of God's love.
I had many thoughts that would run through my head about what it would be like when we brought Steeven home. Would it be instant love, would the kids do all right together, would he be accepting of us, would he even like me, would I be willing to parent him like he needs or not want to make him sad? When we met Steeven in the airport I must say that none of these thoughts went through my head, it was like he was finally with us and life was continuing on without really missing a beat. He loved us, responded to us and the feeling was very mutual. When the kids met each other there was a short time of just realizing that he was actaully here, after over two years of them being dedicated to praying for him it was actually real now. Carter struggled some with what to do about Steeven's runny nose and eyes, but he got over that rather quickly. I would find myself wondering what they must be thinking and how they could just love him without being able to fully grasp what was happening. I think as adults we do think too much about things sometimes. Kids just "do" and it comes naturally. My prayer for myself I guess would be that God would help me in that area. I think waaaaaaaaay too much sometimes and it wastes a lot of my time.
Now to Steeven, what a kid! All that he has been through and experienced and yet I can see how in God's infinite wisdom Steeven has been prepared for all of this. God has given Steeven such a personality that he just rolls with the flow, so to speak. He was the only kid, or adult for that matter, where he lived that wasn't terrified of the earhtquake. That's right, he even liked it. He enjoyed his trip to Miami and has been enjoying things ever since. The only two things that are "bad" to him are the dog and the hospital. The dog is growing on him though. I did pray that God would be doing this, getting all of us ready for what was to come, and he is a faithful God who listens to his children. I am so thankful.
Now, having said all of this, I have to say that I am not going into this journey blindly. God does not tell us that when we follow where he leads us everything will go smoothly. Just look at Steeven's hospital experience and the families/income I have lost from daycare. I do know though, that God will see us through all of this and he knows what is yet to come.
Thank you God for your love and how you have shown us the importance of adoption as you have done it with us. What an example you have set for us! I am also thankful that you have given me a little glimpse of your love through the way we love Steeven, my son. Help us to be aware that how we live our lives is an example to others as well. Amen.